Insecurities

I finally got to present my case study today, and i must say it wasn't easy... I did my case study alone, and presenting it while being pitched against by 2 clinical instructors was just too overwhelming. Maybe i was just being a wimp or drama queen. But being unable to answer questions confidently was a big blow to my already low self-esteem. Crying wouldn't solve the issue, but i did anyway. But i did feel better after that... Our CI is really nice, but the way she questioned was just too 'hostile'. Now i'm upset that i couldn't have been just a bit stronger... Again, this demonstrates that i feel extremely insecure when my knowledge just isn't enough. It's not as if i don't read my textbooks or if i'm complacent in increasing my knowledge. It's precisely because i do so that makes me feel dumb when i can't answer questions... Ah... The irony... Somehow i feel like i'm not 'on' for this attachment... I feel very unprepared and inadequate in so many unbelievable ways.

I should bury myself in all my books. Hell yeah!